I can't think of a good way to begin the end, but it has to be done. My fellow amigas del hat share the mixed emotions I do. Called by a mix of biology and circumstance, Nicole and Jennifer have already flown back, but I'm still clutching at my last hours here.
[Warning: complete navel gazing ahead. Sorry. Funny stuff next time,
I SWEAR.]
Although, as Jen pointed out, I get to come back. That's a really good point. Like, a very good, very compelling point that has eluded me all semester. It's why it felt so important that I do a post now, while I'm still actually in D.C. I've been acting my life ends when the semester does.
It's a good and terrible way to live. For me, it's meant being so nervous that I started getting hives and so tired that I fall asleep at 6:30 on a Friday night and don't wake up until Saturday morning. And it's not like it got me any heroic results either. Next semester, I will try to be less crazy maybe. But I'm leaving with all my cards thrown down on the table and that feels good. Maybe quixotic even-- which reminds me of one of my favorite quotes:
Whether I win or lose, it does not matter. Only that I follow the quest.
(Oh yes. I went there. Pulling out all the stops.)
So in that vein, when I left for my last day of work, turned in my last papers, studied for my last finals, I did it with this hat. I will also be wearing it tomorrow, along with all the other clothes I use as talismans for luck. It's the only reasonable way to end: riding off into the sunset with a cheesy hat.
